Done Deal

#askboris

Eastern European scavs were moaning the loss of free everything as David Cameron came away from the EU budget piss take pretending he'd tried really hard to keep our money away from them cunts, "peasants in Europe need our homes and jobs more than we do so we'll return in January to completely fuck ourselves over".

Great Britain

class

All the lefty cunts were loving it this week as their favourite muslim Abu Qatada won the right to a bigger house and as much money as he can cope with. Home Secretary Theresa May vowed to send him packing one day real soon, "I got rid of some last month so only five million to go now".

You Get What You Pay For

W ednesday

T hursday

F riday

With public enquiries & fucking nonces everywhere David Cameron decided to blame Twitter but by the end of the week none of his mates were in the frame after all. The BBC and greedy fat socialist cunt Tom Watson promised renewed bullshit to link Margaret Thatcher to "we won't give up, we'll study every blog till we find something".

Wonderland

double your money

twice as much 

Mighty eurosceptic David Cameron was so furious at losing a commons vote allowing him to rob us even more, he vowed to completely ignore it. Mouth wrapped round EU cock he promised them cunts 'more spends for socialist fuck'. But the Parliamentary Labour Party spoke and declared "we're just as full of shit as you and we've just as many Lord McAlpine's too!"